The tall bearskin hats worn by the guards at Buckingham Palace are a tradition that goes all the way back to the defeat of Napoleon at Waterloo in 1815. Unfortunately, Britain now faces an adversary against which it is less likely to prevail: the unhinged, animal-killing fanatics of PETA:

Military chiefs are to meet with an animal rights group on Tuesday to discuss alternatives to the traditional bearskin hats famously worn by the guards at Buckingham Palace.

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (Peta) are to hold talks with Ministry of Defence (MoD) officials to put forward what they say are ethical alternatives to the 18-inch (46-centimetre) tall fur hats worn by army guards.

Peta has previously discussed fake fur alternatives with the MoD but military bosses were unimpressed by the prototypes.

Now Peta has come up with an alternative shape, but insists its design could be as famous as the traditional hats.

Squawks PETA kook Robbie LeBlanc:

We think we are a modern nation but the queen's guards are walking round with an entire dead bear on their heads.

That the Ministry of Defense feels obligated to negotiate hat designs with an animal rights cult best known for publicity stunts involving public nudity gives an idea of how firm a grip moonbattery has taken on the throat of a once mighty nation. But I can't wait to see PETA's new hat design. Something made of cabbage might set off the guards' red tunics nicely.

On a tip from Oiao. Cross-posted at Moonbattery.