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August 06, 2008
Melissa Clouthier I'd Vote For Paris--UPDATED

UPDATE:

OK, so I demonstrate, once again that it might be a good idea to take a gander over here before I post. Stink! Sorry, people. While the video is the same, the content, is not however. You've obviously seen the video if you read John's post. I'm removing it and putting a link to the post below, so your eyes don't burn out seeing Paris' naked legs twice.

*******

So, have you seen the best advertising for John McCain, yet? [Note: Obviously, you have..] Yesterday, Paris Hilton released a video putting forth her energy policy. She had to cut the video short because she had to pick a Vice Presidential candidate, bitches, but hey, she makes sense:

My first thought watching this video was Cassy Fiano's, too: "Scary question: if Paris and Barack were your two choices, which would you vote for? I honest-to-God don't know who would be worse."

Well, let's consider what Paris has that Obama lacks:


  1. Job experience--as in, she's had a real job, paid real taxes and had to make executive decisions

  2. Owned a company--forget pie-in-the-sky ideals, she knows what it's like to hire and fire, to haggle with lawyers over contracts, to negotiate.

  3. World awareness--sure it's Ibiza and Paris and London, but Barack Obama has nothing on Paris when it comes to jet setting

  4. Style--Obama has the sunglasses, nose-in-the-air, jacket over the shoulder panache but, Paris throws in the head toss and minces in a way Obama just can't for the camera--although, I have to give it to him, he's pretty damn good.

  5. Policy--While Obama talks one more government bail-out, Paris discusses energy policies that are actually workable and sensible.

  6. Youth--Obama is young and fresh and exciting, but Paris is even younger, and fre...well, younger. Neither one of them seem particularly fresh. Smoking to stay skinny works for them, though. Something for the youth of America to consider.


All in all, Paris is hawt, bitches. Obama seems like, so, totally yesterday compared to her.

Cross-posted at Dr. Melissa Clouthier

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