10. The stewardess explains that if you crash in the ocean, you should use the person next to you as a floatation device.

9. The pilot says, " I dont know our altitude, but we're up there really high now, man".

8. Over P.A. you hear, "Heh, heh, heh, this plane sucks, heh, heh, heh"

7. "Alive" is the in-flight movie.

6. The pilot is wearing a Domino's Pizza uniform.

5. The person next to you yells "Turbulance!" and poors his hot coffee into your lap.

4. The pilot announces over the intercom "Folks, we may experience some turbulance here shortly. I'll be boinking the stewardess and we cant seem to avoid bumping the flight stick occasionally."

3. Pilot says "We're cruising at an altitude of 40 feet"

2. You're at 40,000 feet and the co-pilot and the pilot are both eating chips and watching the in-flight movie.

1. The pilot announces over the PA, "We should arrive in Chicago i... @#%$ Chicago who all wants to go to Hawaii?"