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The l33t Hax00r By Afton Walker

Written By : John Hawkins
January 1, 2012

This a pretty interesting ICQ prank. Afton was sitting behind me at work. Bobby messaged him. I hate Bobby.

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Afton introduced me to Bobby a couple of months ago through ICQ. He said he was a good kid and had a few questions about web pages. After talking to Bobby for about 30 minutes I came to realize he was incredibly stupid, ignorant, annoying, foul mouthed, and probably smelly as well. After 30 minutes I flat out told him I was deleting him and didn’t want to speak to him anymore.

Yet every few days he messaged me asking me questions about Afton like I was his $%&$%*$% wife or something and would know. Well Afton had stopped talking to him as well but Bobby kept messaging him. Then Bobby messaged him at work while I was sitting behind him and an evil internet prank was born…

Bobby’s 3rd grade level spelling was left in to further humiliate him =D. My comments added in green…(**No actual hacking was done in this prank. The only thing Afton did was a Dos command to see the IP address after Bobby messaged him. Also I’m usually the last person to make fun of someone’s spelling but Holy Crap…wait til u see =P**)

Bobby: hia

Afton: hey

Bobby: is that u??????????????? :)

Afton: yeah I have been looking for you (**That was a lie =D**)

Bobby: how do u mean, u have ben ignoring me for ages…about a month :((**Hahahah**)

Afton: ahhh I just want your ip

Bobby: why do u want my ip ???

Bobby: u still there afton!! it really is good to know u r rtlaking to me i did not have n e 1 as helpful as u to turn to wen u would not talk!!

Afton: I just do for my own reasons hehe

Afton: oh I am gonna help you alright

Bobby: why did u want that (**So he can send u a birthday card, why would anyone have any legit purpose for getting your IP**)

Afton: why thank you

Bobby: you dind’t know that I was a l33t Hax00r? (**Those words will come back to haunt you in this prank**)

Bobby: yes i did thats why i gave u a false 1 :)

Afton: that is ok I know the real one want me to give it to you?

Bobby: go then

Afton: …**.**.**.151

Bobby: try again

Afton: nope that is it hehe I know it is oh and nice firewall by the way

Bobby: yes thnaks but wat u gona do please dont ahrm me (**Is that how l33t Hax00r’s beg when someone gets their IP address?**)

Afton: I might come in and look around a bit. nice shirt by the way you might wanna trn the webcam off hehe (**Afton is full of crap. He knows Bobby runs a web cam and just thru this in but the l33t Hax00r buys it completely. At this point Bobby logs off for 10 minutes I suppose to turn off his web cam =D**)

Bobby: ehehheeh how can u ways my ip bye the way (**This has so many l33t Hax00r mispellings in that I feel the need to translate “How can you see my IP by the way”**)

Afton: do what?

Afton: heheh you can run but you cannot hide hahaha

Bobby: come on then god hack me dont think u can ok (**The l33t Hax00r immediately logs off just in case Afton actually tries anything and then logs back on like 10 minutes later**)

Afton: you what? hahah did you just nuke yourself dummy?

Bobby: wat nuked!! nothing was wrong here

Afton: hahah you just dropped offline like a little egg (**a little egg? haahahhaha**)

Bobby: come on chicken sh*t

Bobby: no but i did nt i went off line i clicked my connection and said disconnnect

Afton: owww are you scared?

Bobby: not 1 bit come on do something then hard man wat u forget is i have been to undergrounhackz .com and got a programm for hackers come on watch your coputer wat ahppens wen i get yar ip for hackming mine come on come on(**hackming? That must be some cool l33t Hax00r slang**)

Afton: heheh ok you want it you got it ***.**.37.137.port 1583 heheheh

Bobby: ok go then lets se yar stuff then

Bobby: no listen can u talk to me with the programm u have can u set a up a direct link

Afton: hehehe I can do a lot wanna see your screen? (**OMG, at this point afton did a screenshot of his own desktop and sent it to Bobby. Bobby being the l33t Hax00r he is completely believed that was his own desktop**)

Bobby: yeh

Bobby: hey wat programm u got

Afton: you know what you are so lame you suck you can’t do s*it ti me (**My God, he’s a l33t Hax00r, don’t talk to him like that or he’ll crash your computer.**)

Afton: it is called dos (**As a side note, this is true. Dos plus and ICQ message and you can get an IP address**)

Bobby: no lsitne wi have we fell out

Afton: you just cussed me out fool

Bobby: where cna i get it form i want to do it to someone in aool instant messanger i wont do it to u (**The l33t Hax00r wants to know where to get DOS from? O..K**)

Bobby: cussed u out?????????

Afton: yeah

Bobby: see ya me off c ya afton

Afton: yeah you just get goin I hear your momma calling you (**Hahhahahaha**)

Bobby: ok me bak now

Afton: why???

Bobby: u found ne ways to make cash yet or have u found ne ways to hack pc’s or can u tell me how to hack somone on icq’s pc or aol insatn messanmger

Afton: I have always been good at many things

Bobby: oh right, =eh can u tell me how and wat u cxan do its jsut my friend i wana hack her pc and her cam is on and can i see her (**great the l33t Hax00r wants to use his mad skillz to take peeps at some poor girl on her web cam. Go to a porn site you freak**)

Afton: Heheh you need to be good at a lot of stuff

Bobby: can u help then please u aint hacked my pc so i wont hack yours have i got dos or do i need to donwload the programm that lets u do this u will help u wont ya please please

Bobby: so………………. please where can u read about hacking then

Afton: www.astalavista.com

Bobby: and wat does it tell u there did u retrt ure pc in dos

Afton: hehe man you will figure it out

Bobby: k can u tap in there web cam with out them noticing (**agains with this webcam stuff. God what a loser**)

Bobby: does it tell u all how to do it at that site

Afton: yep

Bobby: i ahve ebtered in english now wta do i lcik on

Afton: just float around

Bobby: i dont ahve a clue wat to clikc on on the sitewen im inis it search the best undergourn dhackl sites or wat (**9 out of 24 words are spelled incorrectly(including the double on) in one long $*%$*%$ up sentence**)

Afton: well you think that I am going to teach you how to do that?? you wouldn’t let me come to your house

Bobby: lol u were kidding and would u honestly do that for somoen over here lolppleas help man (**lolppleas? WTH IS A LOLPPLEAS?**)

Afton: man I aint’ teachin you how to hack you would get malicious

Bobby: oh coe on please tell me where to go to find out exactly wat i do….. i would not get mulisicous please i promise not to hack u (**Do you swear you wouldn’t get “mulisicous”**)

Afton: you wouldn’t hack me if you did you wouldn’t have a harddrive left fool

Bobby: so there u go i wont hack u then………..i jsut want to know where i can learn how to

Afton: you just look around

Bobby: i dont know wat im loking fo thats the thing

Afton: then no I can’t teach you nothing you are dangerous

Bobby: lol no aint ok

Afton: you suck go away (**Afton has the gift of gab **)

Bobby: ok im in dos now how do i hack onpot a pc

Bobby: i dont know how to get onto someone elses web cam :(

Afton: you have to be an l33t Hax00r like me hahah why don’t you quit eating at your computer

Bobby: wats the address for that then

Afton: hold on let me run it

Bobby: thanks your cool

Afton: ***.**.48.111 port 1833

Bobby: how do u find that out where do u go p[lease afton i wont bother u wat is l33t Hax00r wats teh address 4 it or wats the programm etc

Afton: that is what I am

Bobby: can u let me knwo how toi hack someones pc i ahve a few school mates on now (**I hope one of your school mates reads this and beats your @ss**)

Afton: heheh you know what the win.ini is? I see yours right now

Bobby: knwo what is it

Afton: heheh I see yours want me to delete

Bobby: wat is it

Afton: hahaha if I delete it your computer go bye bye hehehe windows initialization delete hehehe

Bobby: dont please dont i would not do it to u (** Liar! You’d delete it quicker than you’d look at that girl’s web cam =P**)

Afton: hahah but I ain’t you.. ok you choose a file I will delete it heheh how about your modem driver?

Bobby: noo!!!!!!!!!1

Bobby: please dont!!!!!!!!!!! (** All the exclamation points are from the l33t Hax00r school of begging**)

Bobby: tell me how to hack please

Afton: what are you gonna give me to not do it

Bobby: ok u ahve made a point u can hack me silly but dont

Bobby: what do u want!!

Afton: silly no I am serious

Afton: gimme your soul in blood (**I suggested this**)

Bobby: i know okto make sure u r telling em the truth ell me 3 things that r in my doucmnents

Bobby: your soul heheh I don’t have to tell you what are in your documents heheh you know what I know…hahahah here we go config.sys

Bobby: no dont p[leasejsut tell me or i cant belive u jsut pelase 1 thing in my documents

Afton: you have a jpg file in your docs

Bobby: called i ahev laods name 1 thing

Afton: me.jpg (**Afton completely made this up and this idiot didn’t even check..yet..hahahah**)

Bobby: yes give me 1 more thing and ill belive u

Afton: hahah i know what you don’t have anymore hahaha I will start deleting one file per minute till you give me your soul let me see where to start

Bobby: how can i give u my soul?/? (**good question**)

Afton: pledge it to me in blood (**good answer**)

Bobby: right theres 129 things in my documents delete 1 thing n e thing and wen i go abk in it should say 127 if ur telling the truth

Afton: oops hope that picture of that naked girl didn’t matter

Bobby: i aint got 1 of a naked gal!! (**he should of said a naked chimp knowing Bobby =P**)

Afton: not anymore hehe now I will go to the icq menu

Bobby: okand do wat

Afton: now hmmm let me see no I don’t want to delete that I want to talk to him while hacking him

Bobby: no afton how do u hack please tell me

Afton: heheh you will learn after I delete the I/0.sys

Bobby: dont please wat have u deleted so far

Afton: your bootlog.txt

Bobby: dont please tell me ow to do this please

Afton: Give me your soul now the frunlog.txt gets it

Bobby: ooooooo u feel it ooooooozzzzing through

Afton: gimme your soul in blood…now the backup.bin

Bobby: wat have u deletd in totla so far

Afton: three files heheh now I am looking for the next victim don’t you feel your computer running slower?

Bobby: nope infact faster

Afton: it won’t be in a minute hahah gimme your soul

Bobby: tell me how to hack u lieing c*nt (**See the charm? This is why I love Bobby so much**)

Bobby: i jsut checked msconfig and evrety thing is still there

Afton: hahah just wait you little freak your computer is gonna die!!!!

Bobby: dont think so freak!!!!!!!!!1 u will die

Afton: I haven’t deleted anything from the ms config yet haha

Afton: bring it b*tch

Bobby: go on then u aint delting anything yet either

Bobby: fucik off u as!!!!!!!!

Afton: bring it boy I want your soul I will suck it from your cojmputer

Bobby: i dot think so go the wi u no done it yetok dlete evrything everything from my document and ill givbe u it

Afton: you will give it to me or I will take it

Bobby: take it then go!!!!!! (**When the going gets tough, the l33t Hax00r gives up his soul**)

Afton: thank you son

Bobby: hey ps u lining c*nt lol there aint a me.jpg in my documents so uncluck ylol

Afton: you will get slow now boy

Bobby: no i wont lololl no but lsiteni do u know how to hack peoples cmputers y/n how in dos wat command do u use

Afton: hahaha I will never tell you now that I own your soul (**I wonder if Satan taunts people with that same line =D**)

Bobby: u dont though!!

Bobby: ok ill reboot now wta will ahppen

Afton: yes I do you gave it to me and I am sure youare lagging a bit right now hahahahaha I will torment you hahahah I am coming to your house

Bobby: oh yes considering u dont know where i stya

Afton: oh yes I do

Bobby: ach well i dont think u r a a hacker then i rebooted fine lol

Bobby: aftons a tos pot (**and on that note we say goodbye**)

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