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Microsoft Announces AE 1.0 Software for Jetliners
by Benjamin Shelton, Mike 'Hadez' Rotch and John Hawkins
In an attempt to shake up the aerospace industry, Microsoft replaced the entire avionics
system of a recently purchased Jumbo jet with it's own proprietary
Window AE (Aircraft Enhancement) 1.0 software. Delta and American Airlines have already signed contracts with Microsoft to roll out the AE 1.0 software in all of their Jets by the end of the year.
 Some
critics have raised safety concerns about those contracts since the testing
of the new software just began last Wednesday.
But the head of Microsoft's AE division Bill Newman made it
clear there was nothing to worry about "We were quite pleased
with the initial pre-release. Not only was it successful in emulating
a simple auto-pilot navigation system, but the GPS link worked better than we expected."
But the new software was not without its share of bugs as Steven
Nichols, a software engineer contracted by Microsoft for avionics
development, pointed out, "We've had a really rough time
with the new avionics sub-system over the last several months.
It's not unusual for the system to be controlling all four engines
of the 747 one minute, only to crash and shut off all flight control
systems the next. My primary concern is that this type of crash
wouldn't just stop in the air, it would stop on the ground!"
When approached with the possible flaws in Windows for Airlines 1.0,
a Microsoft spokesperson vehemently denied any sort of software
glitch, insisting that the shutdown was merely a "feature,"
helping prevent damage to over-spooled engines. "We understand
the concerns of the public," said the spokesperson, preferring
to remain anonymous, "and I would certainly hope that anyone
questioning our position understands that we're focusing on bringing
down the total cost of ownership by intercepting maintenance problems
before they crop up."
 The spokesperson refused to comment on the photo snapped of a blue-screen during software tests.
This is how Bill Newman summed up Microsoft's position for the record
"This software is completely safe unless it has any security
holes or bugs we missed. But although we're completely...well
that's not accurate..relatively sure this software is safe, mistakes
can happen, which is why we're lobbying congress to pass the 'Jetliner
crash liability protection act'. It's about time we got something
for all those bribes..ehr donations we made."
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